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Highlander's Beloved 02 - A Highlander's Passion Page 14
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He faced her with his hands on the edge of his towel. “Aye, we do have an understanding, or we will as soon as ye give me a chance to propose.”
She tried her best to ignore her rapid heartbeat. He was offering her something she’d wanted for years. “Ye dinna mean what yer saying. Ye cast me aside twice. Right now, yer full of robust male protectiveness. The testosterone is literally rolling off ye. Once that dissolves, ye’ll forget all about this just as ye’ve forgotten about me before.” An old sadness crept in and curled up in her heart like a cat near a roaring fireplace on a cold day.
“Aye, it pains me, so it does, to admit how badly I’ve treated ye in the past. Havena I told ye that? I mean to make up fer me crass behavior toward ye until me dying breath. We’ve been friends since before we started school. I think me mum always hoped our friendship would mature into something more permanent.”
She wrapped her arms around herself. “Aye. So did I. Ye were the first boy to kiss me. Remember how awful it was?” She shuddered. “Our teeth scraped together. ʼTis a wonder we didna make sparks big enough to start a fire that burned the hair off our heads.” They both laughed for a few embarrassing seconds. “The second kiss was more like two fishes coming together.”
He snorted. “Hey, we all hafta learn how to kiss one way or the other.”
“True. I was so besotted with ye, I didna mind being yer practice partner. I was just foolish enough to believe we’d go on forever, teaching and learning from each other. Then Miranda and her family moved here from Aberdeen into the old McGrath place and ye forgot about me.”
As soon as he’d set eyes on the auburn-haired beauty, his and Kenzie’s long-term friendship had gone from predating to casual greetings or quick waves. Miranda became his whole world. She was pregnant by high school graduation and dead moments after giving birth to Colleen.
“I willna apologize for Miranda. We loved each other.” He crossed his arms and narrowed his eyes. “She was a good and decent person. An angel in her own right. Without her, I wouldna have Colleen.” His chin jutted in that stubborn way he had.
“I didna expect an apology.” Her Scottish stubbornness reared its head, too—only she wasn’t Scottish, was she? Nay, she was of nationalities she knew little about. “I’m only trying to explain how I felt when ye dropped me as yer best friend. How deserted I was. I went through the rest of high school like a zombie while watching ye make a fuss over someone else as if she were the only person in the world.”
Kenzie swiped at a tear, remembering how jealous she’d been. She and Bryce had gone through every year of school as best mates. He’d always stuck up fer her when the kids made fun of her for having two different-colored eyes. Witch, they’d called her, and Bryce was ready with clenched fists to defend her.
Over the years, those students had formed their own cliques. Once Bryce moved on with Miranda, Kenzie was completely on the outside—alone, depressed, and with no one to talk to.
“Things change when a guy falls in love, especially for the first time. I’m sorry I ignored ye, but Miranda was jealous of our friendship and didna understand our close bond, so I gave in to her wishes to make her happy.”
He couldna have said much more to crush her heart than that. How did one battle a dead woman, especially one still adored by her husband? More tears flowed and she walked away so he couldna see. Telling him she was changing into her pajamas was impossible without her voice breaking and giving her away. She opened the door to the small refrigerator on the other side of the room, pulled out a bottle of water, and gulped a few sips. More in control, she turned toward the bedroom. “I think I’ll get ready fer bed now.”
Her fingers were around the doorknob when Bryce’s hand covered them. Damn, but he could move silently on his bare feet. “Are ye afraid to tell me the rest? Do ye think I dinna ken when yer hiding something from me?” He used his other hand to pull back her hair so he could lean in and press a kiss beneath her ear. She shuddered in response. “What is it, sweetheart?”
“It doesna matter now. I was only thinking of trying to make ye see how brokenhearted I was again when ye ended things between us over a year ago. Me heart has a weakness for ye, so it does. ʼTis why I canna open it to ye again.” She glanced over her shoulder at the painting of little Blaine. “What’s past is past and lost forever.”
He whirled her around, his features hardened. His jaw muscles bunched and heavily lashed eyes narrowed. He grabbed her biceps and yanked her to him. “I ken how I grieved for Miranda a long time. Too long.”
Yes, nearly four years was a long time to wallow in his wife’s death, but, even after that period, he still wasna ready to move forward.
“When I started dating ye, Kenzie, I fell in love with ye hard and fast and deep. ʼTwas no idle flirtation or a night out to slake me needs. Nay, I loved ye with a power so strong, I didna understand the scope of it. Damn, but it scared me.” He released her, stalked across the room, and, on a ragged exhale, continued. “Bloody hell, I felt as if I was being unfaithful to the memory of me beloved dead wife. Hell, I was so fukin’ confused. I wanted ye with me all the time and yet I could recall, not so many years earlier, when I had similar desires fer Miranda.”
He swiveled to face her, his forehead wrinkled and his jaw tensed. “Ta be honest, what scared me most was that my desires fer ye were even stronger, and, in me head, that had to be wrong. What kind of man begins to care more fer a woman than the one who gave her life birthing his bairn? I got this wild idea in me head that me love fer ye was a passion—an unhealthy passion.”
“So ye sent me away. Ye thought only of yourself and Miranda.” She wrapped her arms around her waist in a protective gesture. “Ye didna give a minute’s thought to how ye would destroy me.”
“Aye. I made the biggest mistake of me life. Fer I have loved ye every day since, even when ye were wedded to another.” He crossed the room, and the sensual electricity between them arced when he enveloped his arms around her. “When it comes to ye—the tenderness, the affection, the indulgent nature…aye, the deep love continues to grow. Call it passion, if ye want. I’m calling it forever. I was wrong to push ye away so that ye became vulnerable to Duncan. I willna let ye go again.”
“Do ye think ye have a choice, Bry?” The man acted as if she had nothing to say in the matter. She was free to date whomever she wanted. Free to look fer a man who would cherish her forever, not for however long it was convenient. Hell, she was free to live alone the rest of her days, if she desired. Alone, safe, and somewhere far away.
He reached for the ball cap he’d tossed on the back of the love seat and started picking clear tape off the top. “Do ye have scissors I can use for a minute? Colleen went a little overboard on the tape and knots and I canna break the twine with me fingers.”
His daughter helped him tape the condoms in his cap? What kind of numpty-headed da would allow such a thing?
Kenzie pulled a pair of shears from a drawer of the desk and, resisting the urge to rap him over the head with the blades, extended them to him. As far as she was concerned, the bampot ought to bear a knot or two on the side of his head fer even allowing his daughter to handle a foil packet, much less several. Some men had no sense when it came to sex.
The twine he cut away was wrapped several times around the button at the crown of his cap. “Ye canna imagine my daughter’s excitement in helping me prepare this. She was full of instructions she’d seen in her movies or I had read to her in books over the years.”
“Just what movies have ye been allowing yer daughter to watch? ‘Glenda Does Glasgow’?” As for what type of books he’d been reading to her, Kenzie shuddered to think. Whenever she spent time with Colleen, she found the child sweet and exuberant, with an almost magnetic innocence. Och, she bore her da’s stubbornness, so she did. Still, what did the little girl ken about condoms? She glowered at Mr. I-Got-Condoms-in-Me-Cap, her ire rising. “ ‘Instructions’?”
“Aye. Her instructions. She’ll demand a
full report, so I must do this correctly for her, but most importantly for ye.” Bryce slipped a ring from the twine, placed a throw pillow on the floor, and dropped to one knee. A blush covered his cheeks. “The pillow is me daughter’s orders.”
Both of Kenzie’s hands flew to cover her gaping mouth as she stared at the diamond ring sparkling in the grasp of his fingers. Her heart rate kicked up. My God, what is he doing?
“In the Matheson clan, we value history and tradition. Creighton gave Paisley the diamond worn by the last few generations of Matheson brides.” He held a ring for her to see, the stones sparkling in the lamplight. “Me mum had a rough time birthing me. I was breech, and the biggest of her bairns. Afterward, she hemorrhaged. Da thought he’d lose her. Rumor is, he refused to leave her bedside and nearly went out of his mind with worry. Once she recovered, he gifted her with this heart-shaped diamond flanked by channel-set rubies. I’m asking ye to marry me and to wear me da’s gift of his love and devotion to me mum, after me birth, as yer engagement ring.” He touched the diamond before casting his glistening eyes on hers. “Fer ye truly are me heart and I have loved ye for a long time.
“Breath for breath.
“Laughter for laughter.
“Heartbeat for heartbeat.”
Her gaze flicked from the beauty of the ring to the sincerity of his expression. He was often a tease, but tonight his countenance bore nervousness. Golden flecks glowed in his brown eyes and his breathing was irregular. His wide hand was splayed over his chest, covering his heart.
“Are ye serious, Bry? ʼTis no joke?”
Gone was the cocky smirk and the smiling eyes. “No joke, sweetheart. Sometimes saying certain words comes easy. Other times, sharing the importance of the true emotions within me are hard.” He lifted a shoulder. “Rejection stings for anyone, and the way I’ve treated ye in the past, I deserve the wound of yers if ye chose to deny me.”
This proposal was the last thing she’d expected, although she’d dreamed of it for years. Longed fer it. He’d been the only man she’d ever truly loved, even when she was mad as hell at him. “Och, Bry.” This really had come as a complete surprise. If she refused him, he’d demand to know why. If she told him of her plans to leave this part of Scotland to keep him safe from Fauste, she kent him well enough to suspect he’d mess with her car so it wouldna run.
Bryce took her trembling hand and held the diamond near her ring finger. “I’m repeating me daughter’s words now. ‘Will ye marry me and Colleen?’ ”
Tears flooded her vision. She’d have the man she’d loved since childhood, and she’d finally have a chance at being a mum. But at what price? Their safety. Yet, it was what she’d wanted for so damn long. Selfishness overruled protectiveness. “Aye, Bry. I will marry ye and Colleen.”
The warmth of the gold band soared to her heart as Bryce quickly slid it onto her finger. Once it was in place, he kissed it, and then stood. He cupped her face in his large, calloused hands and locked his warm gaze on hers. “In Scottish, we say, ‘Ah love ye.’ In Gaelic, ʼtis ‘Tha gràdh agam ort.’ ” He lowered his head until his lips brushed hers, and then they shared a few soft, gentle nips. “Me love for ye will never fade. It will only grow stronger. I love ye and want ye to be me wife and mum to me daughter. Fer every time I’m near ye, yer pure quality and remarkable beauty take me breath away.” He kissed her again. “Yer sweetness does too.”
Sweetness? Did she have any left after Duncan?
“I’ve always loved ye, Bry. Always. But with all that’s passed between us, surely ye can understand I’ll need time to believe ye mean what ye say. Even with this diamond on me finger.”
“Aye, I ken yer reluctance. I will romance ye until ye have no doubt.” His lips covered hers and turned potent and possessive. His mouth tasted of berries, honey, and a tang of whisky. It was a combination a woman could succumb to without a moment’s hesitation—succumb to and be seduced by.
Kisses rained over her cheeks and neck. “I’ll be indulgent and tender with ye, but God help Fauste if he tries to take what’s mine. Fer ye are me heart, me woman, me future. When ye called me name through Effie’s window, all I could think of was getting to ye as fast as I could. That ye needed me—bear or man. Ye needed me.”
“I did. All I could think of was having yer strength around me.”
“ʼTis what every man wants from his lady…to be needed. ʼTis an important part of our male pride, that we can provide safety, security, and love fer the woman in our lives.”
The tone of his voice had a bite of warning to it. Kenzie was almost afraid to make eye contact for fear he’d ken what she’d been planning. Aye, she’d accepted his ring and his proposal, but at the first sign of Fauste she would head fer parts unknown. She couldna allow Bryce or Colleen to be hurt.
“Look at me now, fer I ken yer thoughts.” His arm banded around her waist. “Get this fact through yer bonnie head. No matter the danger, no matter the fear ye feel, ye willna run and hide. Yer safety resides at the lodge, in me arms.”
Seconds ticked by as they stared at each other. How had he guessed?
His finger rose and trailed down her cheek. “I can read ye like a book, luv. ʼTis not yer job to protect me or Colleen.” He tipped two fingers under her chin and leaned in to murmur against her lips, “ʼTis me job. A Scot takes care of what’s his and whom he loves. Are we clear?”
She was Macha Verena, one of The Protectors. Surely she could keep a secret or two from one bossy, sexy Scot and do it well enough he’d never suspect. “Aye.” This was not a lie, was it? Nay, it was part of her Wiccan job—to protect.
He tugged off her T-shirt and began kissing her shoulders. “Tonight, we will make love several times, in many ways, because just as ye needed me strength around ye earlier, I need your moist tightness around me now.” He unsnapped her bra and cupped her breasts. “And, believe me, one time with a sexy woman like ye willna be enough.”
“Come.” He sat in the floral wing-backed chair by the fireplace and untied the towel that hung low on his hips. His erection sprung free. “Straddle me lap so I can kiss those lovely breasts.”
The corners of her lips lifted into a smile. The man was so cocksure of himself. Well, he had a surprise coming. “Dinna think I will follow every order ye give.” She dropped to her knees, and with her palms on his thick thighs, forced them apart so she could get between them. “Sometimes women get ideas too.” She kissed the inside of first one thigh and then the other. “Better ideas.” She wrapped one hand around the base of his cock and leaned in to run her tongue around the head of his erection. When a drop of pre-cum oozed out of the slit, she lapped it away, the salty, musky taste of it turning her on. She licked his cock from the head to its base while her fingertips teased his balls. Power was a heady feeling, and right this instant she kent she possessed him in as many ways as he planned on possessing her—physically, emotionally, and mentally.
Bryce’s hands clasped the arms of the chair. “Sweet mother of God! Do ye mean to—”
She twirled her tongue around his head two times before she took him completely into her mouth.
His hands fisted in her hair. “Bloody hell, Kenzie. Holy, fukin’ hell. So good. So damn good.” From that point on his words didna make a whole lot of sense, and she reveled in the power she had over him. “Stop or I’ll come.”
She worked her lips harder and did more wicked things to him with her tongue. Her fingernails scraped across his balls. Duncan had taught her to fear him. Bry had taught her he’d protect and love her.
“Ye want it, dinna ya? Ye want me to lose meself to ye like this. Ye seek to own me.” His head reared back and he yelled her name as he shot hard and fast into the back of her throat.
His rasping breaths echoed off the walls of the sitting room. “Holy hell.” Another moment passed before he spoke again. “Did ye shave yer pussy? Or have ye challenged me on that request too? Although I must say”—he glanced at his semihard penis, passed out in its nest o
f dark curls—“defiance isna totally a bad thing.”
Chapter 13
Bryce absorbed all the nuances of Kenzie’s facial expressions and body language—the wagging eyebrows and the smirk at her full lips. She was right pleased with the blow job she’d just given him, and well she should be. He’d feared for a few rapturous minutes the top of his head was going to lift off like one of those whirligig toys he’d had as a lad.
Once the initial twinkle faded from her eyes, a sadness took over, a soul-deep sadness that tore at his heart, for he kent he was the cause of it. She’d never once hurt him, but he’d hurt her over and over.
Maybe tonight shouldna be about sex. Maybe he should treat her like the jewel she was and save the sex for another time. How could he win her heart if all he paid attention to was her sexuality? There was more to this wonderful woman than what nature had placed between her legs.
He stood and reached for her hands to help her stand, as well. “Ye are a true wonderment, me future wife. The most generous person I have ever met. Except for a wee bit of temper, ye are damn near perfect.” He kissed away the scowl his remark about her irritability created on her luscious lips. “In years past, I have hurt ye, and yet ye treat me like I’m someone special.” He feathered kisses over her face, trying his best to be as gentle as possible. “Why dinna ye get ready for bed while I take a quick shower. Sometimes the odor of me bear remains after I shift back. I want to hold ye against me all night, so I need to smell me best.”
She nodded and started for the bedroom.
“Kenzie?”
She stopped and regarded him over her shoulder.
“Tonight, I have offered apologies, made many promises, spoken more words of love than I think I ever have before—and I have meant them all. My proposal came from two hearts who love and need ye, Colleen’s and mine. From this moment on, ye will be treasured like ye’ve never been before.”
“ʼTis a lot to take in all at once. I’m trying, but old insecurities surface.”